i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
