Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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