Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
