There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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