He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
