If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
