yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
