Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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