My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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