In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
