Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
