Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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