Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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