OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
