Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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