We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
