sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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