i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize