batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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