its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
