Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
