I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
