Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Randomize
