I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize