You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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