so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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