I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
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And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
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Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
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