i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize
