are you so shy because you have an std?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize