Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
