Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
