Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
