Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
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