Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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