she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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