the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
