And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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