Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize
