Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
