Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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