I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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