Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Farmville is her only friend.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
