we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I have post one night stand depression
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
