We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
