I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
