You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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