Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
