I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
