Do you still have your period?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
