Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize