don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
you made out with another girl for some wings
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
